Food envy

And so it arrives, that sizzling stirfry, that succulent leg of lamb, that gooey chocolate pudding with creamy vanilla ice cream. The waiter has a little grin at everybodys 'oo look at that!' reaction, proudly carrying the spectacular dish as if he had anything to do with how good it will taste. It arrives, looking and smelling sensational, and it is put down on the placemat opposite you. As you stare down at your comparatively average looking dish which was smuggled in under your nose, you kick yourself for having changed your mind last minute. Your mouth salivates as you imagine feasting on that far superior dish, and the child in your head whines 'I want one!!'.. I call this food envy.

On Tuesday I went for a 'moving out of your boyfriend's parent's house and growing up' meal with (as you may guess) my boyfriend and his parents. We went to a wonderfully quaint little pub in the nearby countryside. When the menu arrived I studied it meticulously knowing that as I wasn't with my sister I couldn't get away with spending 20 minutes deciding what to eat (hey, these are important decisions!) . Feeling the pressure (such a first world problem), I opted for duck with an orange glaze on sweet potato (it was a posh pub). My decision was made with the following guidelines in mind  1.) It's not something I would cook at home. 2.) It's more exciting than the rest of the menu. 3.) When you go out for a meal you're allowed to choose fatty duck over a salad. 
Everybody else went for a classic pub grub style sausage and mash or steak pie, and when they arrived they were huge plates of home cooked bliss. Mine was not. 

My tough duck with its layer of soggy fat was as disappointing as it sounds. To make it worse I did the worst thing you can do in such a situation; I asked to try my boyfriend's dish. Never do this! Even if you are quite enjoying your meal,  trying the superior dish will always make yours taste like gruel in comparison. So here is my advice: When ordering against the clock, or in a place where you can't recite the menu off by heart, stick to the basics, you can't go too wrong with fish and chips (unless your vegetarian). 

Travelling duo- will it make or break you?

Before setting off on my Australian/ South East Asian adventure with my boyfriend, I was given some seemingly wise words of wisdom: travelling with your partner will either make or break you. Unsure of what to do with this non advice, I must admit I was a little on edge at both the idea of returning from my trip engaged (made), or with a broken heart and a few more notches on the bedpost (broken..the relationship not the bedpost). 

Absorbing the idea as gospel and embarking on my trip of a lifetime, I couldn't ignore that faint niggling feeling that sooner or later my relationship was going to turn into a soap opera. This did not happen. In reality, yes there were times of 'breakage', mainly as a result of the excruciating 28 hour bus journeys, tired, incredibly tetchy and desperately in need of a toothbrush (arguing becomes a form of entertainment and halitosis is a major passion killer.)  But then came the 'making up', watching the sun set in a brilliant blaze of tangerine and magenta breeds romance and unashamed PDA. 

Travelling will affect your relationship, but so will starting a new job or going on a diet. Don't worry that travelling will push your relationship to the edge, it will, but if a relationship is meant to last, it will. Don't expect that standing the test of travel puts a ring on your finger (just because he likes it does not mean he will put a ring on it), life will change a lot when your plane lands back on reality. When the blazing sunshine and sumptuous street food are replaced by grey clouds and Gregg's pies, you will wonder what on earth you are doing with your life. But if your relationship makes it back in one piece give yourself a pat on the back and buckle up for life's next roller coaster.

Do opposites attract?

You have that ideal person in your head...A dark, mysterious Italian? A blonde Aussie surfer? You may day dream of that Latino lover, but chances are you won't end up with them. I'm not being negative, I'm saying that the person who we think is our ideal other half tends not to be. 

When I was eight I had a massive crush on Stephen Gately; Boyzone posters wallpapered my walls and 'Key to my Life' blared from the stereo (much to the disappointment of my classical music loving father). My sister, friend and I used to argue about who was the most worthy of being Stephen's wife, the result of which was based on who had done the most research reading Boyzone annuals. It came as a bit of a shock when in 1999 he came out of the closet, and I was informed that my dream guy was dreaming of guys. Yes I know I was a child and I also wanted to marry Ashton Kutcher and Josh Hartnett, but you see where I'm coming from; our perfect person often isn't as perfect for us as we think.

But how about your ideal half being your opposite? Going for a leisurely stroll with my boyfriend I was surprised when he referred to us as opposites; I had always thought the fact that we were so similar had made us such good friends, and that was the key to our relationship. So I asked him to elaborate. He responded by telling me that I am a chatter, I'm from a family of talkers who (as the name would suggest) fill any silence with questions, a spontaneous outburst of song, or a verbalised train of thought (or verbal diarrhoea as he so nicely put it). He, on the other hand, is very chilled out and, not quiet ,but content with a bit of silence . I protested that I enjoy silence from time to time and I don't always ask questions.  So he took me back to earlier that day when he was half way through getting dressed and I asked the 'what are you thinking?' question. He replied '..erm, nothing'. I was confused...'what do you mean, you have to have been thinking something' (isn't everyone's mind a constant whir of activity? My mind is a breeding ground for the deep and meaningful). Exasperated he replied 'ok, well I guess I was thinking..hmmm which socks shall I wear today?'. I found it very hard to continue that conversation. 

And so I realised yes, I do fill silences with pointless questions. I exaggerate while he dumbs things down. I'm an attention seeker while he.. Isn't.  For many things we are quite opposite, but actually that's why we work.  He is the perfect antidote to my 'everything's a drama' reaction to life. Learn from this; opposites do attract and can sometimes be a great combination. Be thankful that your partner isn't your carbon copy, their OCD probably does your messy house wonders. Or if you're looking for love, try somewhere you wouldn't usually go, and rub out the boundaries of your 'type'. Don't be disheartened if you don't end up with Mr right or your girl next door, your perfect person may just be living opposite.